Sister is finally home from hospital. she sent me images of her xrays. i don’t want to creep anybody out or i’d share them. FUCK. she still has a ton of curvature, i had no idea. bunch of screws around her lower back, then a long rod going up to her neck, only fastened at the top. holy fucking shit. I’ll take my plate of room-temperature problems, thanks.
as in, I keep going to bed at like 5am. midnight rolls around and i wake up, and just keep rolling, and then that annoying time compression thing takes over and boom, future. and then, the next day’s light hours are already spent. 1.20am here, not the slightest bit tired, going to go curl up in bed with a German book and hope for crushing boredom soon.
re-organized the staging table to the left of my desk, moved a cube to the near side, filled it with books, and put a shelf on top, loaded that up with all my German books, so now they are very nearby. it’s a start. organized my audio do-list, cleared all the clutter off my desk and made dense do-lists of imminent needs. still raging at the overwhelm of too damn much in my face, but my OCD alibis are nearly done. plus, until my next check comes, i am down to what’s in stock. loaded up a bit on groceries tonight, and thus have 20€ left to blow at Berghain on Saturday, their 6th anniversary (huh, thought the fifth was a month or so ago…must be that was just their record label, or…?), and then I am adrift on fumes. woo hoo! large check expected in, maybe, a week. or you know, like, whenever. cha. they should just fucking name this shit after me.
the other night I listened to two friends chat away in German. i think i recognized about 3/4 of the words, if I really tried, but that was all the computing power i had, nothing much left for actual comprehension. plus that missing 1/4 was a bit critical. But it’s progress. Also just watched the video i made of Nicole, which I’ve never understood a word of, and i think i was able to get maybe half-ish. soooo nice to understand her in her native language, but also of course heart-wrenching. grrrr.
watched an interesting movie yesterday, The Good German. annoying wandering plot, but ostensibly took place in immediately postwar Berlin, shot to match the film stock of a lot of archival footage. Streets piled with fallen bricks and rubble, endless blocks of skullfucked buildings, and dark creaking interiors, tattered and crumply. Quite a slice of history. Also, Cate Blanchett, who i have just never gotten the appeal of, was pretty stunning as a beatdown beauty, like Charlotte Rampling (see her in “The Verdict” someday), stirred with a splash of Garbo. with subtitles, most of the sentences actually made sense to me. Kind of.